Posts Tagged 'authentic conversations'
Unhappy men and happy women.
Published March 26, 2012 Relationships Leave a CommentTags: authentic conversations, couples communication, men and women, relationship issues, Relationships
“It’s sometimes difficult for partners to look past what their own emotions are,” Cohen says. “It helps to know that different kinds of emotions can enhance the way people feel about their relationships”.” [ Re-printed in full from the NPR Health Blog on March 6, 2012]
Improve you work experience and environment- Read the Showkeir’s “Authentic Conversations”
Published November 2, 2009 Books , Colleague Websites and Blogs , World of Work 1 CommentTags: authentic conversations, book review authentic conversations, excerpt from authentic conversations, jamie showkeir, maren showkeir
Maren and Jamie Showkeir’s seminal book on improving communication in the work place, Authentic Conversations: Moving from Manipulation to Truth and Commitment, recently received a glowing review in the online business zine bnet. The link to the review of the Showkeirs’ very informative and well-written book is below.
http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_qa5383/is_200907/ai_n39231112/?tag=content;col1
I recommend this book to anyone seeking to create a successful and inspirational work environment for themselves, their co-workers and their employees.
You can read an excerpt from their book by clicking on the link below:
You can learn more about the Showkeirs at www.henning-showkeir.com
I know that once you’ve read this serious yet accessible book you’ll feel both informed and inspired.
Maren and Jamie Showkeir’s suggestions for the workplace
Published September 1, 2009 Colleague Websites and Blogs 1 CommentTags: authentic conversations, getting along at work, henning-showkeir, jamie showkeir, maren showkeir, work place advice, work place relationships
Often we spend most of our waking hours in a work place, yet few people make an effort to learn effective work place behaviors beyond the skill-set for which they were hired.
Organizational consultants Maren and Jamie Showkeir are nationally recognized experts on developing cohesive and coherent organizational cultures within which all people thrive and organizational goals become achievable. Following is a summary of some tips they have for people in the workplace, and beyond. We would all do well to pay attention to the Showkeir’s advice.
“Workers must wake up and make wiser choices, and there are choices”, say experts Jamie and Maren Showkeir, co-authors of Authentic Conversations,and partners at Henning-Showkeir and Associates, an Arizona-based business and workplace consultancy.
The Showkeirs have described seven make-or-break choices we make at work and beyond. Are you making the most effective choices during your work day? And beyond?
- Blame everyone else — or be accountable for yourself. Stop playing the blame game. Accept accountability for your own role in improving conditions.
- Keep quiet — or speak up. Instead of wandering and wondering, take your questions to a manager who you know and trust.
- Feel helpless — or take action. In the wise words of Gandhi, “Be the change you want to see.”
- Gossip — or do your job. Odds are your workplace is rampant with rumors and what-ifs. Bypass “fictional” chitchat and focus on your work.
- Look out for yourself — or consider others, too. Looking out for #1 is a shortsighted strategy. Success in times of crises requires goodwill and collaboration.
- Tell others how to feel — or listen. Create a safe space for sharing and listening.
- Wallow in doom and gloom — or be hopeful. Rise up and take the road less traveled — convey a grounded sense of hope and optimism.
You can find out more about Maren and Jamie Showkeir, and their inspirational ideas for personal and organizational success at www.henning-showkeir.com
“The Map Is Not The Territory”
Published February 25, 2009 Musings Leave a CommentTags: authentic conversations, korzybski, Relationships, the map is not the territory
Coined by Alfred Korzybski, this iconic phrase, “The map is not the territory”, concisely explained his idea that the idea of something is not the thing itself, meaning that an abstract idea cannot truly reflect the totality an experience, of another person or of an event. For example, ones belief about someone cannot possibly capture all that is true about that person.
Relationships are often fraught with minor, and sometimes major conflicts and misunderstandings. If, as Korzybski states, we can only know things through indirect abstractions and do not have access to the full reality of the world around us, we can take a cue from this simple yet profound notion and use it to create more satisfying relationships with others. Often the root of interpersonal relationships, whether positive, enjoyable and inspiring or negative, hurtful and constricting, can be found in our beliefs about the other person. When we can recognize that those beliefs should more accurately be called assumptions or at least partial truths, then there is room for a change in our “beliefs” and therefore in our way of relating. The willingness to find out about and understand the other person’s experience of the relationship, and correct inaccurate assumptions, both yours and theirs, is a prerequisite for improving mutual understanding and enhancing the possibility of a more authentic conversation.
We are of course used to having faith in our beliefs. That is after all why we hold them so dearly and tenaciously. It’s interesting that we can be so certain even though we all had numerous experiences of finding out we were wrong, or previously misinformed. We may believe someone cares about us, or doesn’t, and be surprised to find out how wrong we were.
Take a step today to find out how well your “map” reflects the “territory.”
